Reality Check Update

All the town hall employees met at 6am and were split into groups and searched specific areas.At 8.30am,the voluteer firemen in the town were called out to help in the search,plus those in the neighbouring town.Kenichi had a business trip and had to leave at 9am.

There were renewed tanoy announcements every few hours throughout the day to ask people to be on the look out for Taiji.From midday,a helicopter was brought in to search the coastlines and mountain areas.And then the rain really got heavy and thunder and lightning made matters worse.But at just before 5pm,there was a tannoy announcement to say that Taiji had been found "safely".Kenichi heard from friends that Taiji was found in his room at home.The mind boogles.Did they not check there or did he arrive home after the search had begun?

Anyway,we then found out that in his room,Taiji had in fact taken a host of tablets and pills.He is in intensive-care on a life-support machine now.

I aplogise for a rather OTT post last night.I re-read it this morning and cringed.But this all opens old wounds.Things with us could have ended up just like Taiji.And I really hope that this time next year ,he will be able to look back with the same confidence that we have right now.

Please keep him in your thoughts.

Reality Check

I think most of you know but last year,Kenichi had a stress-related breakdown,followed by months of depression.It was horrible .And for a moment,I nearly lost the man who I am proud to call my husband and the father of my child.But we were so very lucky.We had the help and support of family and friends.And now ,a year on,life is looking good and he is medication free.

This evening,we heard that a friend of Kenichi's is missing.He was admitted into hospital due to depression a month ago.He is 32 years old and went through the divorce from hell 2 years ago and lost custody of the daughter that he brought up (whilst his wife ran around with her lover...small town and you know it all).

Kenichi will go out tomorrow from 6am to search for him along with all the staff at the town hall and the people in his neighbourhood.

As soon as I heard the news that he was missing,I started crying.Tomorrow morning, they are out to find his body.And everyone knows it.

I hope and pray that we are all very wrong.

Taiji,come home.

Feeling peachy

Popped into the shops this evening after taking Kenichi to a high school reunion.Only went to buy some milk and a bit of fish for Annie's evening meal.But as I was meandering down the aisle on the way to get the milk,I spelt ambrosia...the smell of ripe peaches.Fruit here is,at times,outrageously expensive and I refuse to buy it.Until today.When I was husbandless.And Annie was preoccupied with rolling on the floor and showing off her Winnie-the-Pooh nappy to the shop owners(not that she would squeal on me but still,you never know).And before I had a chance to think about what I was doing,I snatched a single small peach and placed it in my basket.

So,here I am at home alone.Annie alseep.Kenichi still out.And my beloved peach chilling nicely in the fridge.With the price sticker taken off.But I am terrified of eating the damn thing(and I have to destroy the evidence before Kenichi gets back)in case it doesn't taste that good.I paid 380 yen for the stupid thing.

I leave you in suspense.Will it be a peach to remember or will I curse my weakness for wonderful smells?Oh,the excitement of my life here is just killing me;-)

Anpanman LIVES!

Annie is so into a cartoon character called Anpanman and she sings along to his silly little song and gets so excited when he appears on TV every Sunday morning at 6am(yes,that's right,6 freaking am and I would love to see the powers to be about that time scheduling). But we never realised that the freaky little bread guy is,for Annie,a real thing.Until she started,as of a week or so ago,pointing him out to us.

Yesterday we had two Anpanman spottings and today the three.She does it so forcefully ,too.She sees men with a roundish face and wearing either a hint of yellow and /or red and,at once, the finger comes out and she narrows her eyes and says in a loud and low pitched voice "Anpanman da" .Oh gawd.The Anpanmaned men/boys so far have either laughed with us or,but in the case of one of ex-students,escaped with a red face with Annie screaming "Bye bye Anpanaman" after him in front of a host of his delighted classmates.Hope he doesn't take it too much to heart.Anapanman is ,after all,a "Super-hero".....

September 1st :-(

I have had a great summer.No holiday, albeit ,and at work every day apart from weekends off plus a "bonus" day at home with a grouchy and snuffly-nosed Annie). But even going to work has its advantages .As schools in Japan don't close over summer(yep,the teachers come in and do club activities with the kids and extra study) but no classes as such.And I have been coasting along every day spending my time happily from 8am-3pm in casual clothes in a ACed staff room ,more often than not sipping green tea and gossiping away with my colleagues and eating ice-cream.And I get paid for it and get to keep nice and cool.Over the weekends,we have done all the summer things like swimming at the beach or river,hanging out with friends a lot,drinking lots of cold beer,having BBQs and fireworks,going to the odd festival and really having a ball.We have AC at home and hell,all the washing dries within minutes so even Annie's linen nappies are no trouble.

But then,this afternoon,waking up from a lovely afternoon nap with the AC and electric fan keeping us cool as we slumbered through the worst heat of the day,I had a really horrible thought. You see,on Septmeber 1st,term starts.And I will have to actually start working in the true sense of the word.And work means teaching.In classrooms.And they have no AC. With temperatures of 33-5C.And high humidity.And more often than not,no breeze . I leave the rest to your imagination.I ,in the meantime,am wimpering over the keyboard and trying to think that it could be worse somehow.Couldn't it???

Hmmmmm

Two comments in so many days about Annie pissed me off.

1. Went to a local restaurant for a meal.The owner came out,saw Annie and happily exclaimed "Ooooh,she looks just like JonBenent". Sorry but although JonBenet Ramsey was a beautiful little girl,she came to a very tragic end and I really wouldn't use her in a comparison with another child .Maybe I am being too sensitive.But I,Kenichi and MIL all found it rather distasteful.And really,however hard one might squint,our Annie ain't no blonde American babe.


2. I was asked by a local lady how many foreign children go to Annie's day-care centre.I said "None". She replied with "So,it's just your daughter who is foreign then". WTF???I was so taken aback with her comment that I let it go.I am ashamed with myself.

Typical!

Had a really good photo that constituted a blog entry about the local festival.And just now discovered that I must have deleted the thing before I uploaded it.So now I will have to wait until next year to post. Damn!

In the meantime though,here are a few snaps of Annie enjoying her first summer festival in Reihoku,dressed in the tradition Jinbei .Next year or whenever we next go to the next festival,I hope that MIL will splash out and buy her a cheapo(15 quid or so) yukata ;-)

Watching the street dancing.Fascinating stuff when you are just a year and a half!

Comparing Jinbeis with friend Kousuke.And he had the Winnie the Pooh version which Annie was pretty impressed with...

A letter

I can't believe it.I am going to do something that I always swore was a dreadful thing;I refused to do the traditional Japanese "Thank you for bringing me up" speech to my parents at our wedding here in Japan, as I found it all too sickly-sweet and over emotional.But,since then,I have also come to realise that being very British,I rarely put my sentiments into words.SO,here I am this afternoon,home an hour early from work,the house to myself,a big bottle of iced water in front of me and time to say some things that should have been said a long time ago.So,let the true feelings come forth....

ETA(Edited To Add) Posted a few days late for various reasons.

***************************************************************

East Germany,Honeymoon,August 1966.

Dear Mum and Dad,

HAPPY WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!!

40 years on August 5th.A big cheer from me here!Being a mere pup in the married sense of the word (10 years next May),I know just what an amazing and inspiring couple you are.But I don't think you actually realise what a special and unique relationship you have.So,let me tell you some things!

For starters,something very close to my heart is the fact that you have an "international marriage".It seems easy to forget that you, Mum, were born and brought up in Germany.Although you are British now,you were not born that way.You had to learn to speak English.Learn to accept different morals,customs and ways of thinking.You had to learn from scratch and although you kept much of your "Germaness",you have also adopted a lot of "Britishness".And that takes time.And patience.And bravery.As I know too well,it isn't easy leaving family behind to start a new life.It takes so much courage that sometimes it feels plain wrong and is too hard to bare.Mixed marriages are often seen as being exotic,fun and exciting.Yes,in many ways they are.But the concept of being able to give your children the best of both worlds,well,that is just one factor .And without a partner of great patience,understanding and devotion I don't think it can work.And that is where you come in Dad!!

The love and devotion you share is obvious to all those around you.Oh,there have been tough times .And times of despair and frustration.But,you know what,I never knew that;throughout my childhood and up until this very day,I have never once seen or heard you quarelling ,rowing or fighting.I remember vividly a few years ago when I came back for a visit and one of you(I forget which) snapped at the other.One of you was feeling grouchy and the other got the tail end(perhaps it was Dad then!).I was shocked to the core.Seriously,shocked.I had never heard you do anything like it before!It was a few words and then forgotten by you both but not by me!And that in itself showed me what a great gift you have given me....Total trust in your relationship and reassurance that whatever happens around me,you,my parents, are both there.And in love with each other in a strong and firm and everlasting relationship.And nothing will ever change that.

Good times,Bad times.As any family we have had our fair share of them but,I often think that we have been fortunate as we have had much more of the former than the latter.Good things and bad things will happen from now onwards.But I know that whatever happens,whether we laugh or cry,however far apart we may all be,you will always be there.

Thank you for letting me follow my heart.Thank you for letting me go.And thank you for showing me just how it should be done.Kenichi and I have a long long way to go in many respects and in 30 years time,if we are even half as happy as you are,we will be truely content.

And another thing I'd like to add,is please win that damn lottery so that we all have access to First Class aeroplane tickets whenever we feel like seeing each other.Not much to ask now,is it??!

We love you so very much and are with you in spirit as you celebrate your 40 years together.

Mariannexx

Amakusa,May 2006.