A letter

I can't believe it.I am going to do something that I always swore was a dreadful thing;I refused to do the traditional Japanese "Thank you for bringing me up" speech to my parents at our wedding here in Japan, as I found it all too sickly-sweet and over emotional.But,since then,I have also come to realise that being very British,I rarely put my sentiments into words.SO,here I am this afternoon,home an hour early from work,the house to myself,a big bottle of iced water in front of me and time to say some things that should have been said a long time ago.So,let the true feelings come forth....

ETA(Edited To Add) Posted a few days late for various reasons.

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East Germany,Honeymoon,August 1966.

Dear Mum and Dad,

HAPPY WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!!

40 years on August 5th.A big cheer from me here!Being a mere pup in the married sense of the word (10 years next May),I know just what an amazing and inspiring couple you are.But I don't think you actually realise what a special and unique relationship you have.So,let me tell you some things!

For starters,something very close to my heart is the fact that you have an "international marriage".It seems easy to forget that you, Mum, were born and brought up in Germany.Although you are British now,you were not born that way.You had to learn to speak English.Learn to accept different morals,customs and ways of thinking.You had to learn from scratch and although you kept much of your "Germaness",you have also adopted a lot of "Britishness".And that takes time.And patience.And bravery.As I know too well,it isn't easy leaving family behind to start a new life.It takes so much courage that sometimes it feels plain wrong and is too hard to bare.Mixed marriages are often seen as being exotic,fun and exciting.Yes,in many ways they are.But the concept of being able to give your children the best of both worlds,well,that is just one factor .And without a partner of great patience,understanding and devotion I don't think it can work.And that is where you come in Dad!!

The love and devotion you share is obvious to all those around you.Oh,there have been tough times .And times of despair and frustration.But,you know what,I never knew that;throughout my childhood and up until this very day,I have never once seen or heard you quarelling ,rowing or fighting.I remember vividly a few years ago when I came back for a visit and one of you(I forget which) snapped at the other.One of you was feeling grouchy and the other got the tail end(perhaps it was Dad then!).I was shocked to the core.Seriously,shocked.I had never heard you do anything like it before!It was a few words and then forgotten by you both but not by me!And that in itself showed me what a great gift you have given me....Total trust in your relationship and reassurance that whatever happens around me,you,my parents, are both there.And in love with each other in a strong and firm and everlasting relationship.And nothing will ever change that.

Good times,Bad times.As any family we have had our fair share of them but,I often think that we have been fortunate as we have had much more of the former than the latter.Good things and bad things will happen from now onwards.But I know that whatever happens,whether we laugh or cry,however far apart we may all be,you will always be there.

Thank you for letting me follow my heart.Thank you for letting me go.And thank you for showing me just how it should be done.Kenichi and I have a long long way to go in many respects and in 30 years time,if we are even half as happy as you are,we will be truely content.

And another thing I'd like to add,is please win that damn lottery so that we all have access to First Class aeroplane tickets whenever we feel like seeing each other.Not much to ask now,is it??!

We love you so very much and are with you in spirit as you celebrate your 40 years together.

Mariannexx

Amakusa,May 2006.